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Collards is green
my dog's name is Blue
and I'm
so lucky
to have a sweet thang like you.
Yore hair
is like cornsilk
a-flapping in the breeze
Softer than
Blue's
and without all them fleas.
You move
like the bass,
which excite me in May.
You ain't got no
scales
but I luv you anyway.
Yo're as
satisfy'n as okry
jist a-fry'n in the pan.
Yo're as
fragrant as "snuff"
right out of the can.
You have
som'a yore teeth,
for which I am proud;
I hold my head
high
when we're in a crowd.
On special
occasions,
when you shave under yore arms,
well, I'm in
hawg heaven,
and awed by yore charms.
Still them
fellers at work,
they all want to know,
what I did to
deserve
such a purdy, young doe.
Like a good
roll of duct tape
yo're there fer yore man,
to patch up
life's troubles
and fix what you can.
Yo're as
cute as a junebug
a-buzzin' overhead.
You ain't mean
like those far ants
I found in my bed.
Cut from
the best cloth
like a plaid flannel shirt,
you spark up
my life
more than a fresh load of
dirt.
When you
hold me real tight
like a padded gunrack,
my life is
complete;
Ain't nuttin' I lack.
Yore
complexion, it's perfection,
like the best vinyl
sidin'.
despite all the years,
yore age, it keeps
hidin'.
Me 'n'
you's like a Moon Pie
with a RC cold drank,
we go
together
like a skunk goes with stank.
Some men,
they buy chocolate
for Valentine's Day;
They git it at
Wal-Mart,
it's romantic that way.
Some men
git roses
on that special day
from the cooler at
Kroger.
"That's impressive," I say.
Some men
buy fine diamonds
from a flea market booth.
"Diamonds
are forever,"
they explain, suave and
couth.
  
But for
this man, honey,
these won't do.
Cause yo're too
special,
you sweet thang you.
I got you a
gift,
without taste nor odor,
more useful than
diamonds...
IT'S A NEW
TROLLIN' MOTOR!!
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